A Parable on Management

A co-worker emailed this to me... I thought it was pretty funny (and sad because it is unfortunately too true to life).

A man was in a hot-air balloon. Soon he found himself lost with nothing but
green fields for as far as the eye could see. Eventually, he happened to
float over a man who was walking his dog. He leaned over the basket and
yelled out, "Hello! Where am I?"
The man on the ground replied, "You're about 20 feet above the ground in a hot- air balloon."
The balloonist cursed him and shouted back, "You must be a statistician."
"Why do you say that?" asked the man on the ground.
"Well," shouted the balloonist, "You're absolutely correct but your answer was completely useless."
"Oh I see," replied the walker, "And you must be a manager."
"Actually, you're right," said the balloonist. "How did you know?"
"Well," said the walker, "First you were lost. Then, after working out what information you needed to sort yourself out, you asked someone else to get it for you. Now that you have the information, you're still lost, but it's someone else's fault."

For Grandpa

It's been a little over a year now since I lost my Grandfather... As most of you know, I was in Iraq at the time and was informed via email. Since I could not attend the memorial service, I stayed up almost all night after hearing the bad news, writing a poem that C. read at the service for me. It was hard to go back to the States, knowing he would not be there. I thought that it would be easier once we got through all the holidays, but I still miss him every day, and especially when I go home to visit my family. As was thinking about him yesterday, I remembered the poem I wrote last year. Re-reading it, I was reminded of how much I have to be thankful for. I have so many great memories with Grandpa. I will carry those with me forever.

Here is the poem I wrote that night in Ramadi a year ago:

What are ya doing, Grandpa? I want to do it too.
I want to be like you, Grandpa, I want to be like you.

Do you need a hammer or screw?
Whatever you need; let me get it. I want to be handy like you.

Grandpa, can I play the math game with you?
How do you divide10,068 by one hundred and thirty-two?
Teach me, please, Grandpa, I want to be smart like you.

Can I come up Grandpa, can I come up too?
I want to see the flying bridge. I want to be part of your crew.
I'll even clean and sand it, and paint the bottom blue!
May I drive the boat? I want to be captain like you.

Can you teach me how to dance, Grandpa, and waltz around the room?
Teach me to follow as you lead, I want to be graceful like you.

Can you teach me about investments and the stock market too?
I don't really understand it, but I want to make money like you.

I watch the way you work, Grandpa, always honest and true.
Can you teach me your work ethic, Grandpa? I want to be respected like you.

I want to work for the Navy, Grandpa, and sail the ocean blue.
I want to fight for our freedom, I want to be brave like you.

I remember as a little girl, putting both feet into your one shoe
Now that I'm grown I know I will never be able to fill them like you
Not much else has changed, though, Grandpa… I still want to be just like you.

Movie Review: He's Just Not That Into You

I remember when the self-help book came out... my friends and I all thought it was pretty funny and we used it as a catch-phrase quite frequently when discussing stupid boys and their unexplainable antics. So, when I saw the trailer for this movie I was actually interested in seeing this particular chick-flick (not a favorite genre of mine in general). Friday night, I went to the theater with a couple of friends, ready to sit back and be amused... but I was not - not really. Don't get me wrong; there were a number of really funny parts to it, but overall, I felt that the movie fell flat. The characters were losers. It was hard to relate or really empathize with any of them. I just kept thinking, "get a life already!" What I took away from the movie is that, girls, you are not the exception to the rule... until... you are. And guys, yes, even the most cynical of you can fall utterly, hopelessly in love with a girl. My recommendation: save your money. Rent it if you must, but don't rush to see it.

And I thought I graduated from high school long ago!

Apparently my boss puts letter grades on assignments. I am not even kidding! One of my co-workers got an A- on his "paper." Other co-workers got a B and C, respectively. I guess that is what comes of being a homeschool dad. That is the only explanation I can give... =/

So, how does it feel to be THAT old and unmarried?

How do you answer a question like that? I didn't really know what to say when a friend posed this question to me the other day. I mean, on a day-to-day basis it doesn't feel like anything. It's not like I wake up in the morning thinking, man, I am still single! I pretty much go about daily life with little thought to my relationship status (or lack thereof). There are days, however, when I think back to my childhood and my general expectations at that time. I distinctly remember how I felt one day 20 years ago upon finding out my choir director's age. My first thought was, wow! she is too old to still not be married! She at least had a boyfriend at the time, so it was only a matter of time before that would change. Of course, the paradigm from which I was working was based on all I had ever known... all the women in my family got married young. I thought that was they way it was supposed to go. So, now that I have grown up and reached an age that no other woman in my family has managed to attain while still single, my perspective has changed a bit. I don't mind that I am still unmarried. But I do not like the idea of little kids looking at me and thinking what I thought of my choir director so many years ago. I just don't want to be thought of as old. What can I say? I can be a little vain at times... =/

Déjà vu (all over again)

I had a rather interesting (notice, I did not say good) experience yesterday. I had to fly out of town for work... while I was there, I met up with some of my Army buddies, whom I had not seen in a year (ironically, it was the same day a year ago that I left Ramadi). It was great to see them again and catch up, but it was also really hard to say good-bye again. However, I had work to do and little time to dwell on it. Then, as I sat at the airport, it happened... the strangest thing! Everything was very familiar because I had been to this particular airport quite a few times in the last several years... that is not what was strange. I was waiting at the very same gate as I did a year ago... the last leg of a very long trip home. Images flashed through my mind... so real, it was hard to believe it was only a memory. I could see myself, wearing a Ramadi firefighter t-shirt and a beige hat, Adidas bag in hand. The memories kept coming... February 2008... I had left all the newly acquired friends I had made in Iraq - friends who were like family to me - and was headed back to see my real family minus one. I still had not faced the reality of my grandfather's death until I was there in the airport one year ago. The control I had over my emotions was tenuous at best... it was all I could do to keep from bursting into tears right there among hundreds of complete strangers. Fast-forward to real-time... February 2009... suddenly all the feelings and emotions of that day one year ago rushed back. The sense of dread and apprehension of the immediate future returned in full force. I'm not sure I have ever had a place bring the past into the present in such a way before. Like I said, it was an interesting experience... it was a true deja vu...