On ropes, logs, and self-doubt

So I went to the USMC obstacle course (or the O-course as the Marines like to call it) this morning. I have never felt so old and out of shape as I did this morning! It was SO discouraging, I cannot even tell you!  I kept playing it over in mind as I drove home... each obstacle - what it looked like, what the technique was for it and what it felt like as I tried to get through it.  It always came back to the same thing: will I really be able to make it through OCS? I had no doubt until today.  Depressed, I got home and baked a loaf of banana bread - now there is something I am good at. Put me in a kitchen and I can create just about anything you could want to eat!  Actually, I have a lot of things I am good at, so, why am torturing myself with all this USMC stuff? I asked myself that question as I mashed bananas and folded in flour.  Well, in fact, there are a lot of reasons, but the seeming impossibility of the course, which initiated the questions is the very thing  that drew me to the Marine Corps in the first place. There is nothing quite like completing the impossible!  I love the challenge.  That is what my current job has lacked for so long.  So, it is time to get my head back in the game and learn to love logs, bars, and ropes.  =)  One day soon I will look back on this with a feeling of foolishness for ever having doubted my ability. I can't wait for that day!