It is enough that He knows

August 1, 2009 was not exactly a high point in my life. After 9 weeks of the most intense training I had ever been through, I was dropped from USMC OCS and returned to civilian life. I was worn out, physically, emotionally drained, and very unsure of my future. However, I was still confident that God was in control, and as my Father, He wanted what was best for me. I had a great support system of friends and family, who were very understanding. One of my friends texted me as soon as she found out.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11

It was meant as an encouragement (and taken that way), but I remember thinking to myself at the time, "well, it is great that He knows, but I would like to be in on the secret as well! It is my future after all." Almost 7 months later, I am very thankful that I was not in on the secret. First of all, if I had known that I would go 6 months without getting a single response from any of the jobs I applied to, I would have been too discouraged to even begin. Second, the waiting time was a great (great in terms of immensity - obviously not a pleasant experience) time of testing for me. During months 1 - 3, my faith was strong. The holiday months were a little harder with their ups and downs, but I was surrounded by my wonderful family, and just felt so blessed with all the non-material things in life that I couldn't be too discouraged. Then January rolled around... A new year, a new start, but I was still stuck in a rut - no change, nothing hopeful on the horizon, still unemployed. That was when the true test came. There were some very dark days (and even darker nights) - far more tears than I would like to admit, and often, my faith was not what I would have thought it would be. But as the saying goes, night is darkest just before the sun rises. Well, the sun is finally shining again, but I hope I do not quickly forget the lessons learned over the last year.

My life is in His hands, and it is ok if I do not know what the future holds.

Like a Mustard Seed...

Sometimes I am just so overwhelmed by God's graciousness to me! It was only a couple of days ago that I was disappointed that I would not be getting the job I wanted. Today, I was not only offered that very job, but only hours later, an even better one!

I cannot help but feel like Job, who when confronted with the omnipotency and omniscience of God, is humbled into silence. Oh, that I would be silent more often and not question God's authority!

I know my faith is often weak, but in my weakness, He shows Himself strong. And despite my faithlessness, He proves Himself faithful. It is at moments like these that I am so thankful for a God who is willing to use faith as small as a mustard seed.

"Why believe in a god?"

No. the lower-case "g" is not a mistake. This is the newest ad staring back at commuters as they ride the metro in the DC area. Below the question the ad goes on "Just be good for goodness' sake" as if that solves all the problems. However, the American Humanist Association (the group behind these ads) needs to go back to remedial logic classes. Without God, there is no standard of right and wrong. There is no good and evil. Our entire system of justice has been historically based on a Judeo-Christian foundation (i.e. the laws of God as they are found in the Bible). Without that foundation, the entire superstructure of our society crumbles. We now need to go back and define what "good" is. I once heard a philosopher say "in one civilization, the people love their enemies, in another, they eat their enemies." Which is right? Who are we to say which way is good? Can we really judge the cannibals - I mean, that is what they were taught from childhood. They obviously think it is right. Ok, enough with that... I think you get my point.

Now here is the kicker! The author of this article describes the ad, saying it has "a picture of a fake Santa Claus" as though there is such thing as a real Santa Claus! (granted, there was a real St. Nicolas back in the day, but I do not think that is who is being implied in that statement). So, let me get this straight, we should not have to "give credit to something that doesn't exist" (i.e. God), but we should believe in Santa Claus?! I am just glad we have our priorities in order! One thing is sure, my faith in the American people is definitely waning.