Confessions of a Closet Romantic

My thoughts are random at best, and I could not pretend to know where they come from. Lately, I have been thinking about romance... the ideal, the fantasy and the harsh reality. Why, I don't know... Actually, I am a romance junkie at heart, brought up on Louisa May Alcott and Jane Austen novels, madly in love with the Mr. Knightlys and Col. Brandons. Most people would probably be shocked by this confession, but it's true. I do not like modern romantic comedies and "chick flicks" because besides being unreasonable, they make me uncomfortable - too much sex and awkward innuendo. Of course my lack of interest in weddings (at least, my own) and my oft-declared intentions to NEVER get married have contributed to my reputation as a I am cold-hearted soon-to-be old maid. The truth is I have become disillusioned with the wedding industry as well as marriage (thanks to the many failed marriages I so often witness all around me). All that Hollywood tries to sell off as love is not real. It's sad, really. So many girls watch these movies, read the books, and pour over the magazines, hoping their Prince Charming will magically show up on their doorstep. It's left me with a bad taste for it all. However, while I cannot honestly say I know what it feels like to be happily in love, I do believe that true love exists. For me? Well, I don't know if I would go that far. But I do know I won't settle for less. I am not going to get married for the sake of it. If I do manage to fall utterly, hopelessly in love, then maybe. =) Until then, I will remain the single, wandering adventurer. It's not everything I would have hoped for, but it's not a bad life.